Speaking: How To Make Your Audience Fall Asleep


0. The coming of the prophet 1. Love 2. Marriage 3. Children 4. Giving 5. Eating and Drinking 6. Work 7. Joy and Sorrow 8. Houses 9. Pets 10. Clothes 11. Buying and Selling 12. Crime and Punishment 13. Laws 14. Freedom 15. Reason and Passion 16. Pain 17. Self-Knowledge 18. Teaching 19. Friendship 20. Talking 21. Time and Space 22. Good and Evil 23. Prayer 24. Pleasure 25. Beauty 26. Religion 27. Death 28. Forms Of Existence 29. Real vs Virtual 30. The Farewell


Ten Tips to Send Your Audience to Sleep

Have you ever fallen asleep when listening to a speech or presentation? Sometimes a little nap during a presentation can boost your energy for the rest of the day. Speakers- if you want to be the one to send your audience to sleep, so they will be fully alert for other people’s presentations follow these ten tips.

1. Make sure that your material is dry and boring. Make sure that your material is either highly technical or complex. If at all possible fill your speech with specialized academic content that is not easily understood without prior study and research.

2. Do not include any explanations or illustrations to make the content understandable to the average person in your audience.

3. Schedule your speech to be at the end of a long day or after a big meal. This will give added incentive for drowsiness and lethargy.

4. Speak softly and avoid any expression or vocal variety that might distract or interest your audience.

5. Stand still behind the lectern for the entire speech. Any movement or sudden gestures could wake up your audience.

6. Avoid any variation in style in your presentation. Do not change from talking to using a flip chart, PowerPoint or any other kind of visual aid or prop that will attract attention.

7. Do NOT include any humor or stories in your speech that might illustrate the important points you wish to communicate.

8. Do not keep to the topic of the speech. Spend a large amount of time rambling about subjects or personal experiences that are boring and totally off topic.

9. Speak about a topic that is very familiar to your audience. Keep your content to things that they already know.

10. Provide highly detailed handouts, so that your audience will not miss out on any important information during their snooze. Make sure that you do not say anything that is not included in the hand out. For best results, just read the handout word for word.

Hopefully, by following carefully the ten tips outlined here, you will have the satisfaction of seeing an entire audience snoring quietly and happily throughout your entire presentation. If you do not follow these tips you may be alarmed to discover that your audience is alert and interested in what you have to say.


0. The coming of the prophet 1. Love 2. Marriage 3. Children 4. Giving 5. Eating and Drinking 6. Work 7. Joy and Sorrow 8. Houses 9. Pets 10. Clothes 11. Buying and Selling 12. Crime and Punishment 13. Laws 14. Freedom 15. Reason and Passion 16. Pain 17. Self-Knowledge 18. Teaching 19. Friendship 20. Talking 21. Time and Space 22. Good and Evil 23. Prayer 24. Pleasure 25. Beauty 26. Religion 27. Death 28. Forms Of Existence 29. Real vs Virtual 30. The Farewell